So how do we mentally gear ourselves up for a new school year? For the parents or caregivers reading this that are like me, and completely new to the parenting game when it comes to the literal very FIRST day of school, I’m especially talking to you. But just the same, this article can serve as a reminder - think New (School) Year resolutions for the veteran parents. What are our Back to school resolutions to keep our connection and structure thriving with our child(ren)?
As such, the kids are growing, and as they continue to become more independent, it leaves room for a change in our dynamic with them. Maybe they don’t need us for as many things and ofcourse we want to nurture that independence. They're in school all day, we're working or handling business all day. Where do we find the balance? How do we keep connected?
While there really is no secret way to getting it right, it’s a matter of what is right for you, your child(ren) and your household to make this new school year a good one. That might look like trying a new routine this school year. However, if you nailed it years ago and are still successfully slaying every school year with your methods, please do share your tips and tricks - I am all ears!
For us newbies or those still struggling with all that comes with back to school, when we’re still processing the first time we took them to daycare, there's good news: You get to decide what this can look like for you. Don’t let the highlight reels tell you any different or make you feel like you’re not already doing a fine job!
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The back to school list for Us…
Read with your child(ren) 📕 This is a mandatory before bed in my home. If I do nothing else right on this list, we read even if 5mins is all we have on some weeknights. If you’ve got older kids, maybe even just reading your own individual books but in the same room with TV’s off could be something you do together.
Play 🛝 Be it memory games, puzzles, or make homework fun and interactive. We also like to take a walk after dinner a couple of days a week before the nighttime routine. And even if all you have is once a week to spare, that’s better than no days. An hour a week is better than zero minutes. Honestly, even just sitting with them at the table while they do homework can make them feel you’re there with them and not just doing all these other things around the house.
Talk Safety 🔗 At school, outside of school, on technology, and more. There's tons of information on how to educate kids on keeping them alert and safe. It can never start too young. A big word in our house now is "dangerous". However, you have to relay the message on the importance on safety, keep it top of mind between you and your kids!
CHECK OUR THIS RECENT BACK TO SCHOOL LIVESTREAM DISCUSSION ON THE TOPIC OF DIGITAL SAFETY, PARENTING, GAMING AND MORE ON MACARONI KID!
Enforce rules and schedules ☑️ Don’t just say you will. If we don’t get them on the right track, who will? If we free up the time it takes to brush teeth or do little tasks that we can start teaching them, it will free up quality time or simply make keeping a bed time a little more doable. For us parents, it’ll make us a little less stressed.
Assign chores 👕 Toys cleaned up before bed, dishes after dinner, pick out clothes for the next day, help with laundry, etc... This gives us a chance to do 10 mins here or 5 mins there worth of our own to do’s. It’s not easy to give up our reigns, but as we know autonomy is important too. And kids generally love to help!
Remember that teaching and lessons don’t just happen at school 💡We are first and foremost always our child(ren)’s teacher. Let’s not miss the opportunities to do just that.
Prep meals together 🍽️ This one might be tricky but we can dream. Even if you only do it for one night together a week or let’s say they’re not big enough for this part, get creative with keeping them near you in the kitchen doing an activity or their homework even while you cook. Depending on their age, talk them through the recipe, ingredients, and process. Quiz them on colors, names of items, try it in different languages if you can. This could go for the young kids as it could for the older kids.
Have conversations 🗣️ Hard ones and even silly ones. I’ve scheduled on my calendar milk and cookie time before bathtime. Everything revolves around time, doesn’t it? But the bonus is, I get to have some tea while we spill the tea on our day. And take this time to name the day’s highs, have your child(ren) tell you something positive that happened that day. Or use this as a check-in opportunity and practice coping techniques for tough situations that might occur at school with classmates or with teachers.
Be mindful of distractors 🥎 Sports, for example, are great. Activities, wonderful. Necessary, even. But we should be paying attention to our kids' cues, their studies and family time. Find what works around the extracurricular. Or maybe let’s not focus so much on filling every minute of their day so much that it becomes overwhelming for you and your kid(s). Quality over quantity.
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Good habits…
The rest of the best tips I’ve compiled are reminders that we still need for our own routines, not just the kids. What we should and could be putting into play starting NOW:
⏰ Set a regular bedtime for you and your child(ren) and stick to it. With some HISD schools starting as early as 7:15 am, a consistent sleep schedule helps children adapt more easily to their school routines. And when we get sufficient rest, we’re more patient and calm. Adequate sleep is crucial and school aged kids should average about 9-11 hours, teenagers 8-10hrs. It’s so hard to stick to when we have a million things to do as parents, but like I tell myself over and over, it’s better to be a conscious parent than for the house to be sparkling clean.
🌃 Establish an evening routine for your household if you haven't already. This could include:
🎶 Switching off screens and playing calming music
🛁 Enjoying a warm bath with some relaxing playtime
A consistent nighttime ritual benefits both children and adults. Even on busy days, try to maintain some form of wind-down routine—every little bit helps create a peaceful transition to bedtime. And we need all the peace we can get. My son has a playlist of guitar and instrumentals that I play in a pinch.
🗒️ Set yourself and your child(ren) up well for the next day and prioritize. Us parents tend to get out of our own routines but children can sense anxiety and possibly take it on when we’re stressed and flying by the seat of our pants trying to get stuff done. It’s ok to let them see you sweat sometimes because we also don’t want them believing things just magically happen for them or everything is easy. We should be mindful not to pass the stress torch to them all the time. Kids love routine. Period. It’s our job to maintain the balance to keep as close to routine as we can.
⭐️ Engage your child in discussions about the upcoming school year. Build excitement by talking on all the good points about learning new things, setting goals, sparking curiosity, and more.
👂🏼Listen attentively and use their responses to foster enthusiasm for the year ahead. This conversation can help ease some back-to-school jitters and create a positive mindset.
📵 Limit screen time. Absolutely no homework or reading to be done with the TV on or the phone in hand. Unless the computer is needed for the assignments, even limit that where possible.
🎒 Every night or two, take a couple of minutes to check the bookbag! Take anything out that’s not needed (like toys or gadgets that might have “snuck in”) and add anything specific needed for the day ahead. You’ll be grateful in the morning.
🍎 Have healthier snacks on hand. For us, that looks like fruit. It’s the easiest when it comes to prep for me. After school, my son usually wants to eat something and I always have fruits on hand for this particular snack time before dinner. I have no sugar juice on hand and just completely avoid all packed with sugar treats because then it doesn’t easily become a problem. It starts at the grocery store and ends with avoiding drive-thrus as much as possible. It’s not to say you will not have to from time to time.
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Outside of home…
👉🏼 Communicate with teachers, familiarize yourself with their style. Is it easy to be a part of the PTA if you work full-time, probably not but that doesn’t mean you can’t find a way to keep open communication with your child’s teacher and be involved. Find out how best to reach them when needed and make your presence known as an informed parent.
👉🏼 Make it a point to attend your child's school meet-and-greet if one is offered and work allows. It's particularly valuable if you're unfamiliar with the teaching staff, as it provides a chance to meet them before classes begin. These events can include school tours, which can be helpful for both you and your child. If possible, bring your child to the school playground a few days before classes start. This can help them feel more at ease in their new environment.
👉🏼 Get a pulse on the homework situation if this applies to your child(ren)’s grade. As a parent, you're the best judge of what's appropriate for your child. If you believe the homework is unsuitable, don't hesitate to voice your concerns. Persistence may be necessary. Overall, figure out how best to stay on top of what homework is assigned so you know what things at home will look like for your child(ren). Is homework excessive? Is it non-existent? This ties back to being in the loop with the teacher and school, their policies and all the above. This can set the tone for your involvement and having an idea on what’s going on.
👉🏼 At the end of each school day, just do what you can. Even this list is exhausting, I know. But they’re ideas. Take what you like, and figure out what is most important to you.
I recognize that not all families consist of children close in age or only child households. It’s not easy to do all things for all of your kids sometimes and it's hard to do most of these things because you're very busy working and providing. It’s a juggling act indeed. What works for one from this list might not work for you. And let’s not even mention the teen phase, we are raising Generation Alpha after all. I hear teens want nothing to do with us and I’m not trying to think that far ahead in my parenting.
These ideas are just a few of my favorite suggestions because they seem the most attainable. I’d love to craft and play and bake with my child all the time…but life. And adulting. Just be open to thinking of ways to navigate the school year. Feel inspired. Again, you are the designer of how this and every school year could look in your home.
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